Recommended Books

I have a love/hate relationship with the idea of recommending books. On the one hand, I love to pass along the book titles and authors that influence my approach to parenting and view of children. If it weren't for those books and authors I would not be the mother I am today. On the other hand, there are a lot of books with a lot of great ideas...that also include ideas I do not embrace in my own practice or philosophy. So I'm torn. But not really. Just as I have faith in a child's ability to grow, learn and become a vibrant, compassionate, moral and capable being, I also have faith in us as parents to shift our parenting paradigm by learning about new approaches and trusting our deep inner-connectedness with our children. I feel my connection in my chest; I know if something is right for my daughter by how it resonates between us and deep within my chest. For some it may be their stomach or behind their eyes; one mother told me she felt it deep in her bones. So wherever you resonate with your child's well-being and your parent-child connection, I feel confident you will listen to it as you grow, learn and become a vibrant, compassionate, moral and capable parent, knowing the impact every interaction has on your child. And I hope you will find something useful in our book resource lists.




In order for us to change any habit in our lives we often need a replacement behavior, whether it's our eating habits, exercise habits, or our parenting habits. Ultimately, as parents, we need a paradigm shift; a new way to view our children to replace our old, inaccurate view of children. A new way to be present with our children to replace our old ways of putting our expectations on them.

 

You can purchase any of these books through our Amazon Affiliate store here.

 

Here are some books to help us as parents begin to reconceptualize our role as parents and our view of children, and promote mutual cooperation & respect while providing alternatives to punishment (all ages):

 

• Unconditional Parenting, by Alfie Kohn
• Simplicity Parenting, by Kim John Payne
• Punished by Rewards, by Alfie Kohn
• How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will talk, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
• ScreamFree Parenting, by Hal Runkel
• The Whole-Brain Child

 

Teenagers have a special place in my heart. Maybe because I used to be one, or maybe because I like their courage to be themselves in a world where they are clearly misunderstood and undervalued. Whatever the reason, there are some great books to help us better understand our teenagers, their developmental goals, and the reasons for their seemingly "rebellious" or "lazy" behaviors. I hope you will enjoy these, and I hope to find more to read and add to the list. 

• Simplicity Parenting, by Kim John Payne
• How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
• ScreamFree Parenting, by Hal Runkel
• Parenting Teenagers (STEPS), by Don Dinkmeyer

 

Self-care is crucial for parents because as our inner resources wear thin so does our patience. Self-care might mean healing our own childhood wounds, creating new healthy food or exercise habits, simplifying the family's schedule, or taking time for ourselves to read, take a bath, watch a movie, or just space out. Whatever part of your self-care regimen needs a boost, I hope you will find some helpful ideas in these books. This list is not exhaustive and I welcome suggestions that I will add as I read them!

• Simplicity Parenting, by Kim John Payne
• Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting, by Jon Kabat-Zinn, Myla Kabat-Zinn
• Buddhism for Mothers: A Calm Approach for Caring for Yourself and Your Children, by Sarah Napthal
• Prisoners of Childhood (and/or) The Drama of the Gifted Child, by Alice Miller

Here are some books on my "To Read" list written by authors who share similar gentle parenting appraches:

• Two Thousand Kisses A Day: Gentle Parenting Through the Ages and Stages, by L. R. Knost
• Siblings Without Rivalry, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
• Peaceful Parents, Happy Kids, by Dr. Laura Markham
• Playful Parenting, by Lawrence Cohen
• Promoting Resilience in Children, by Colby Pearce

Websites and Links: I just want to include some links to make your research easier....

• Alfie Kohn
• Simplicity Parenting
• Adele Faber
• Little Hearts Books
• Alice Miller
• Colby Pearce
• Dr. Laura Markham: Aha! Parenting
• Teach Through Love
• Our Muddy Boots
• The Path Less Taken
• Dulce de Leche
• Play At Home Mom

Please let us know your favorite books that offer alternatives to coercion and punishment and help reclaim a positive view of children!

You can purchase any of these books through our Amazon Affiliate store here.